Wednesday, November 23, 2016

I am not lost - I am on my way.

I have beaten myself up time and time again with this idea of being “lost”.

Not the kind of lost where you are physically out of place, with no sense of direction.  The other kind.  The mental kind of lost.  The kind of lost that you’re just wandering around in your head, having no clue where you’re going or in some cases… what you’re doing.   

With all the opportunities that we’re constantly swarmed with; college degrees, masters degrees, doctorates, internships I believe we have been  a little brainwashed with this terrible idea that when we don’t have a distinct point A to point B direction we are defined as “lost”. 

I think I have been on a mission since I was younger.  A mission to see all the world has to offer, and be passionate in each experience.  I have always said “Yes” to new experiences and opportunities. In fact, I am known in my family for the line “What did I get myself into?”.  I have always wanted it all.  To see it, try it, and experience it. 
To jump in, and see where it takes me. I may be a little older but my mind is just as wild.

These opportunities have taken me to new places, introduced me to new people, given me new prospective, and have planted within me a desire to pursue new things.  I’ll admit, my mind is a little hard to keep up with. 

When I returned from California, after my summer job with CrossFit HQ, I met with an old friend to catch up over a couple beers.  What was meant to be “catching up”, quickly turned into “let’s question all Hannah has done”.  

I got asked things like “What are you running from?” or “Can you identify yourself? Do you know who you are?”.  They questioned why I keep running, and where I intended on going?  They asked if I was looking for myself because I’m not happy with who I am.  To them, it was just questions.  To me, it was insulting. 

My responses boiled down to a simple answer… it’s called curiosity and passion.  It has taken me all over! 

There is beauty in curiosity.

There is also risk and uncertainty in curiosity.  However, why is this a bad thing?  Think of everything around us.  We are rooted to question.   It is tied to our tradition of being a human. Think about it. We now know the earth is not flat, we know why objects fall and are drawn to each other, we know vaccines that can prevent life changing illnesses, and everyday we are making more discoveries that are changing life as we know it.  But how? 

Questioning. Passion. Curiosity.

Discoveries start because of the people that have imaginations that are taking them all over the world.  It is because people see an opportunity and run to it.  It is because people see a problem and are driven to seek an answer.  It is because of minds that do not sit still and are on a mission to create. Minds that are not afraid of being considered “lost”.

So, I believe this term “lost” should be given a different phrase.  Perhaps… “Passionately Curious” is a better representation of it. 

As I sat and was questioned about “running away” and “trying to find myself”, I couldn’t help but chuckle to myself.  Ya see, this isn’t running away.  It is a journey of  pursuing my curiosity and passion, and it involves a series of checks and balance. 

I know who I am which is why I am able to leave home to pursue a passion.  I know my values which is why I am able to surround myself with new people everyday, no matter how different they may be.  I know where I came from which is why I am always ready to grow through each experience.  It is because I know exactly who I am that I am taking on bigger opportunities and have always sought more in everything I do.  Because no matter what the opportunity may bring, it will always take me back to my roots of who I am while teaching me along the way. 

So sure, maybe I can not tell you a specific direction I am headed and hell, my personal compass must of broke because I don’t even know which way I am going sometimes but I know for certain who I am, and what I am about.

I am Hannah Chesley.  I am a whole 5 foot 2 inch body compacted of enough passion and curiosity to move mountains and I am not lost – I am simply on my way. 







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